Wow, it’s interesting being a seminary student, especially at 62 years of age! Interesting, but strange. Great in some ways, but very odd in others.
Yesterday, I spent an entire day reading. I’m not sure I’ve ever done that, just read for an entire day? Then there was about an hour-long online lecture at night. The only time I went outside was just for about an hour to ride my bicycle through our community, then I jumped into our icy pool for a short time, and it was back to reading.
In my first eight-week session, I studied biblical hermeneutics and took an obligatory course in writing and online research. Every week I had to meditate on a different passage of scripture and write my observations and thoughts about it. That was tedious, but I got some great insights out of it. I’m glad for the discipline of meditation and study. The research and writing class gave me a glimpse of how much is out there in the online world, and made me want to be a better writer.
This session, I’m taking a course on Old Testament theology and another on Spiritual Formation. I read nearly 200 pages for the first course yesterday and a couple chapters for the second. One book was about the Hebrew roots of Christianity. I loved that, because it said things I’ve known for years, that Christianity started in the Jewish context, Jesus was Jewish, all the apostles were Jews, all the early believers were Jews, and we must get back to those roots if we want to have a proper and balanced perspective on our faith.
I also read some chapters from a book on the biblical history of Israel. It was all fine print, and started off really hard to follow, refuting some scholars I’d never heard of, and in a way where I didn’t really know if they were saying those scholars were wrong or right (are they for ‘em or agin ‘em?) until 2 or 3 chapters into the book! I was hating it! But gradually, I began to understand their points and realized I could agree with them. They were writing about how the Old Testament is history, it’s the testimony of people God revealed Himself to, and that may seem hard for some to accept, but it’s been shown to be very reliable. It really made some fascinating points, some of which actually related, in my mind, to things I’d learned from Frank Turek’s book, “I Don’t Have Enough Faith to be an Atheist.” Things about self-refuting arguments, understanding history, how we can know reality, and how we know the Bible is true.
Then I had to also read some chapters in a book on Old Testament theology, about how theology is an art, not just a science, and how there are always things that seem to contradict each other, and we have to learn to hold them in balance. There is always a tension in the Bible between this point and a contrary point and it’s not simplistic or easy, but it’s good. It requires wisdom and discipline.
I had to read sections in another textbook and watch some videos about the Pentateuch and the Historical Books of the Old Testament, from Joshua to 2 Kings. I know a lot about those books, and even taught through them at Chapel on Wednesday nights. But the Bible is so amazing. You can never learn it all! Even a brief review of the books, where you boil them down to the essentials, is edifying and interesting. Seeing how different scholars have outlined them and evaluated their message, and how they see their history and the way they’re interconnected, it was really terrific!
I was reading brief reviews of each of the books, and as I’m reading the review of the Book of Ruth, I get tears in my eyes! It’s just so beautiful how God took care of Ruth and Naomi, when they were so desperate, so low, so without resources, and how He not only met their needs, but in doing so, brought into the world an ancestor of King David, and not only him, but the King of all kings, the Lord Jesus! God will meet our needs, and He will even use us to further His Kingdom as He does so!
When I went for my bike ride, I found myself going through each of the books and trying to remember the main message of each. It was very edifying doing that!
Then I read my Spiritual Formation assignments. These too really blessed me. The authors show how we’ve accepted a “conversion only” gospel, where you need to accept Jesus to get your sins forgiven and a ticket to heaven when you die, but we haven’t understood that there’s so much more than this. Jesus preached the Kingdom of God, where we accept Him as our King, our Lord. Jesus called people to follow Him, to leave the darkness of this world and to join a whole new society, which operates by a whole different code, new principles, new power. It’s not enough to just “pray a prayer” to “accept Jesus” and then go our ways, living not much different from the way we lived before. We need Christ to be formed in us. We need to become real disciples.
I loved one quote from one of the writers, Dallas Willard. He said, “God is not opposed to effort; just earning.” By that he means that we can’t earn our salvation. We mustn’t think we have to do this or not do that in order to please God and be accepted by Him. But at the same time, we mustn’t think that Christian life consists of just sitting back like proverbial “bumps on a log,” and doing nothing. There must be deliberate, intentional effort on our part, if we want to be true followers of Christ. We need to choose to put ourselves before the Lord, to spend time with Him, to allow His Spirit and His Word to penetrate our consciousness and have the desired effect on us. We’re saved by grace, but what does that really mean? Titus 2:11, 12 tells us that grace teaches us something. Grace is the desire and power to do God’s will. Grace works. Grace has an impact. Grace changes our lives. Salvation isn’t just for the “spiritual” side of us. It’s meant to affect our relationships, our finances, our work, our physical bodies, our intellects, every area of our lives!
Yet it’s not easy, and it’s not fast. We live in such an impatient society (I was really convicted), and we think change should come in a week or two. But God calls us to a lifelong commitment of following Him and letting Him work. It was really encouraging, yet challenging to read all this. My head was spinning, and I felt like I’d been drinking from a firehose! So many thoughts, so much input, and only my poor wife to talk with about it all! I guess that’s why I wanted to write some of it down?
This time of study is hard. I have lots of assignments this week. I’m going to have to find all sorts of references online, and I don’t yet know where to look or how to find them. I have to write and post my thoughts online and discuss them with the professors and other students. Yet this time of study is also wonderful. It’s a great privilege for me to be able to do it. I know it’s going to change me, impact me, and stay with me for the rest of my life, however long that may be. I’m thankful to God for this opportunity, and want to make the most of it.
The way I figure it, I won’t finish till Spring of 2018. I have to keep my head together and persevere till then. After I graduate, then I’ll see what it was all for, and see if God has another assignment for me. I hope so, but I’m getting old! By faith, I’m sure He does have something for me. But at other times, I really wonder. I guess that’s what the faith life is always like? It’s yes and no, I’m sure, but I doubt, I hope, but I wonder.
Anyway, I’m writing this just to share it with any who might be interested, and maybe, just to help myself get through it. Thanks to those who pray for us, and to those of you who have given to help us through this time. We appreciate you more than you may know!
Till next time, may God’s richest and best be yours!
Warren